It was once so perfect.
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
i should have double check with my juniors before heading to the studio.
i thought i could have a talk with Ms Emily.
this dance journey has been very very very long for me.
from mini performances to external competitions, they are my precious memories.
i miss my dancers, i miss stacie dawn jon farid leonard daryl.
eversince i got through tpde audition, i don't have the enthu-ness in my dance anymore.
i've been wondering for a year or so, yet i'm still unsure with myself.
ballet was where i started from, now i've seperated from it for like a year.
i've grown, being lucky enough, to learn other new genres.
it's interesting but i feel that my heart isn't there.
maybe without the 4 of them?
or maybe i really have lost this passion within me?
i don't know.
of course, my skills are deteriorating because i didn't train enough.
i have no idea where to begin with to brush up all my skills.
so i've to blame myself for being so incompetence and useless.
thank god, i have an awesome baby who are always the one who keep me going in dance.
he trained me, encouraged me, talk to me and cheer me up with little things whenever i'm down due to dance.
there were times i felt like giving up completely.
but i really don't bear to let go.
because i feel at ease whenever i step into the studio and the words and images of Ms Emily and Ms Gina would shift my negative thoughts away.
i feel so lost.
when can i get back where i used to stand?
at least for both of their expectations.
sigh.
i thought i could have a talk with Ms Emily.
this dance journey has been very very very long for me.
from mini performances to external competitions, they are my precious memories.
i miss my dancers, i miss stacie dawn jon farid leonard daryl.
eversince i got through tpde audition, i don't have the enthu-ness in my dance anymore.
i've been wondering for a year or so, yet i'm still unsure with myself.
ballet was where i started from, now i've seperated from it for like a year.
i've grown, being lucky enough, to learn other new genres.
it's interesting but i feel that my heart isn't there.
maybe without the 4 of them?
or maybe i really have lost this passion within me?
i don't know.
of course, my skills are deteriorating because i didn't train enough.
i have no idea where to begin with to brush up all my skills.
so i've to blame myself for being so incompetence and useless.
thank god, i have an awesome baby who are always the one who keep me going in dance.
he trained me, encouraged me, talk to me and cheer me up with little things whenever i'm down due to dance.
there were times i felt like giving up completely.
but i really don't bear to let go.
because i feel at ease whenever i step into the studio and the words and images of Ms Emily and Ms Gina would shift my negative thoughts away.
i feel so lost.
when can i get back where i used to stand?
at least for both of their expectations.
sigh.
